Dear Mass Murderer: I Need Advice

An unemployed writer posing as a 10-year-old boy seeking advice wrote letters to a number of celebrities, including some of America's most infamous killers. The responses to the queries from the "pop-culture historian," as Radar magazine described Bill Geerhart, range from the weirdly sensible (Ted Kaczynski) to the terrifyingly psychotic (Charles Manson).

• Richard Ramirez (on "NightStalker" stationery): "Know any Asian girls willing to correspond? Send pictures."
• Kaczynski (the Unabomber): "I can't advise you about whether to drop out of school, because I don't know anything about you."
• Manson: "I didn't take your money when I had ALL your credit cards locked up in my dreams."

Click the link below for more life lessons from Alan Greenspan, Larry Flynt, and Dick Cheney, plus a dining tip from Clarence Thomas.